Hilarious Alert! Introducing The Red-Eye Wrap!

by Sydney Sadick
Red-Eye Wrap

Frequent flyers, this one’s for you! Have you had enough of those questionable blankets given to you on red-eyes to Los Angeles, or on those even longer-distance overnighters to Europe, Australia, or Asia? According to Betabrand, a crowdfunding clothing company based in San Francisco, they have a solution: the Red-Eye Wrap, a soft, snuggly cardigan with a built-in eye mask. Here’s what the press release had to say about it…


“Okay, so maybe this online clothier can’t say with absolute confidence that off-putting airline blankets are the ultimate bugaboo of civil aviation. But come on, those things are pretty bad.”

“Enter Betabrand’s new Red-Eye Wrap, a soft, snuggly alternative to those wretched communial coverings, most of which have made the rounds like whiskey bottles passed between thirsty hobos.”

“Like a finely woven firewall against the indignities of air travel, this wrap-cardigan hybrid also features a built-in eye mask that deploys in a flash, so that its owner may turn a blind eye to all the horrors afoot in the fuselage: slobbering snoozers, pablum-puking infants, the latest episode of ‘Dancing With The Duggars,’ and so on.”

redeye3“Yes, the Red-Eye Wrap is engineered to shroud you in stylish serenity when you need it most. But it’s not just for the wild blue yonder: In the tradition of Betabrand’s travel-friendly Dress Pant Sweatpants and Dress Pant Yoga Pants , it has an everyday elegance that also makes it a natural for business meetings, brunches, and nights on the town.”

Yeah, we’re not kidding…

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