True Life: I’m A Rich Kid

by Eddie Roche


Here’s a gem from the pages of The Daily Summer: How does a 10-year-old boy among the blessed 1 percent spend his days on the East End? We grilled a precocious (and anonymous) East Hampton progeny to get the scoop on credit cards, chores, and his intriguing media diet.

You’ve been weekending here your entire life.
It’s an escape from Manhattan. I’ve seen a lot.
What do you normally do on the weekend for fun?
We go to events and walk around town. I’m not often seen doing the “typical” kid things for boys my age.
What kind of events?
Well, last summer, I went to Author’s Night in East where I saw Beth Stern and Giada De Laurentiis. I got Giada to sign her cookbook, but I haven’t had my nanny try anything in it yet. They didn’t even have water at the event—only champagne. It wasn’t the most kid-friendly event.
What’s the latest must-have item in your circle of friends?
The Apple Watch! There are also these model Ferrari toy cars that race up to 40 mph.|
Does everyone you know have a nanny?
They do. Some of my friends have a manny, but that’s not for me. That’s more for the sporty kids. I’m not into that.
How long do you get to keep your nanny for?
My mom has promised me that my nanny will be with me until I go to college. I’m not sure what happens to her then, but we don’t really talk about it. She started when I was 2. I had a few before her.
Are there mean nannies?
I’ve actually never seen that. Some of my friends think that mine is strict, but I don’t agree. She has to be tough. That’s her job.
What are the responsibilities of your nanny?
When she picks me up, she has to bring my phone. Every day she has to charge my phone to 99 percent; I don’t want to overcharge it. She stays with me when my mom is away. I’m a little bit demanding and picky. I’m specific about my food. If the cherry has something in it, like a seed, I don’t want it. I like everything in order. My nanny is also the only person who can touch my gadgets, because she cleans up my room. She also organizes my colognes and combs.
Will you have a nanny for your kids?
One for each. I had to share.
When are your favorite restaurants?
I just tried Beautique, which I’d recommend. I had the filet mignon. Every morning we go to the Golden Pear for an iced coffee.
What do you think of their prices?
What’s your hobby?
I don’t really do kid activities. I’m interested in technology and computers. I enjoy going to polo with my dad. I consider myself a kidult.
What’s that?
A kid who acts like an adult.
What do you want to be when you leave kidultood?
An entrepreneur who creates my own technology company and then sells it. My friends want to be pilots, astronauts, politicians, typical stuff.
Any ladies in your life?
I’m a popular guy. I get prank called a lot. Most of my friends don’t date. I get followed a lot by girls. Like, literally—they follow me around and try to touch me.
Where would you go on a date in the Hamptons?
A ride in a Porsche would be cool.
Do you think the girl would like that kind of date?
I’ve never thought of that.
What’s the most glamorous thing you’ve ever done on the East End?
I’ve flown to the Hamptons on a private jet, which was pretty cool, though I’m not a big fan of small planes. I’ll stay with the Jitney for now.
Do a lot of your pals have their own drivers?
Most of them have Uber accounts. After all, Uber’s slogan is “Everyone’s Private Driver.”
What’s the most mature thing about you?
Probably everything. Many people don’t know what they’re going to do in the future, but I’m determined to figure out how to get that done.
What’s the most immature thing about you?
I still fight with my older brother, but he deserves it.
Who is the most fascinating person you’ve ever met?
Jonathan Cheban. It was really, really cool. He was eating at 75 Main, and his security was there; there was a group of seven teenage girls who wanted his picture. He looks really different in person. My idol, though, is Scott Disick. He’s really cool. He’s the whole package. He has cars. Lots of them.
What’s your allowance?
It’s $350 a month, but if I run out, I’ve memorized my mom’s credit card number so I’m covered.
What do you spend it on?
Lunch, Starbucks, gadgets. I also do Postmates three times a week in the city. My mom never knows it’s coming until it arrives. In the Hamptons, I like Surf Shop, but I don’t know how to surf.
What do you think your allowance should be?
About $700 a month seems fair.
You have a credit card. What kind?
I have a Gold AmEx. Sometimes at stores they question me, like when I was buying chocolate recently, and they looked to my nanny to see if she was going to pay, but I gave them my credit card and they said, “Aren’t you a little young for this?”
Do you pay your credit card bill yourself?
My mom does. I don’t even look at it. I am too young for that.
What are your chores?
I don’t have any. I just relax. My nanny does everything. My friends don’t really have chores either.
Is that good or bad?
It’s great! You get an allowance and you can still relax. That’s a good thing, right?
Have you ever mowed a lawn?
Do you think someday you’ll ever mow a lawn?
I highly doubt it. I’ll hire someone to do that.
Taken the garbage out?
I can’t deal with the smell.
What designers do you wear?
My favorites are Hugo Boss and Lacoste. That’s basically it. My mom has to travel to Europe to get me Hugo because it isn’t sold in the U.S. for kids. I’m a picky dresser. I get my shoes custom-made. I had a Vans phase because I was really into skateboarding. I have this 14-karat-gold skateboard that I got for my birthday, but I grew out of that stage.
What do your friends get in trouble for?
A kid at my school got into trouble multiple times for talking too much about private jets and Rolexes. It doesn’t bother me, but for them, it’s too much.
What are your reading habits?
I’m not really into books. I mostly like magazine articles. My favorite is Forbes. That’s not a joke. My brother thinks it’s really weird.
Are you on Facebook?
That’s more for my nanny.

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Muffy Von Mufferson July 9, 2015 - 5:37 PM

Well said, my little lord fauntleroy. Now, let’s meet for lunch. I know a place where you can get authentic Mexican food which is ground by stones pulled with ropes strapped to underaged children. The crops are watered by their tears. It all costs less than your allowance tripled, but you have Mother’s Amex, no it’s not an issue, natch.

Samantha July 15, 2015 - 5:55 PM

Try a little harder.

Jenn July 9, 2015 - 7:11 PM

This seems like an interview with an adult who has not really been to the Hamptons, and is not from money. “Riding in a Porsche” would be “cool?” Please, if you’ve got money, that’s a pretty pedestrian car.

Jo Nicole July 10, 2015 - 7:21 PM

This is embarrassing. For the boy and for his parents. I want my children to grow up having fun, and enjoying gadgets etc, just as much as the next parent. But I also want my kids to know the value of hard work, a good attitude and the understanding that others in the world as not so lucky. This is excess- to the point of disgusting.

Mick July 10, 2015 - 11:25 PM

Sounds like a fake interview to me lol. Why is this even news haha.

Dave July 15, 2015 - 5:03 AM

Agreed, this interview sounds likely to be fake. It sounds fake enough that I’ll ask the editors of this publication what sort of fact checking they did to verify that this kid exists and that this interview took place.

I don’t doubt that kids with a lifestyle like this exist. I’m sure some of them are the combination of spoiled and sheltered – yet intelligent – that this kid seems to be. The way this supposed 10-year old talks, though – the vocabulary, the phrasing – doesn’t sound like a precocious 10-year old “kidult”. It sounds like how an adult might imagine a precocious 10-year old would talk.

I’m also trying to think through the legal and ethical implications of conducting an interview like this with a 10-year old. Would it be legal and ethical to do so without his parents’ permission? And I find it tough to believe that they’d give permission for this interview to occur and be published unless, at a minimum, they secured agreement to read it before it was published.

A claim of an anonymous interview with a 10-year old ought to include at least a few sentences of disclosure about the journalistic ethics of the situation. Although that obviously wouldn’t be needed if the interview never really happened.

Klw July 11, 2015 - 12:51 AM

This made me laugh. He’s trying so hard to sound grown up but his idols are Jonathan Cheban (Kim Kardashians best friend) and Scott Disick.


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