Net-A-Porter’s Gucci Capsule Collection Has Arrived; An Open Letter to Alessandro Michele

Dear Alessandro Michele,

What gives, baby? While it’s true that I want to buy every single thing you design—and we haven’t felt this way about a brand since Ann Demeulemeester circa 2004—you have seriously failed us. Today’s the day: Your exclusive capsule for Net-a-Porter has arrived. And chéri, we dutifully logged on before we’ve even had our Hair Bender, before we even said good morning to our cherubic toddlers, before we even dared to check Snapchat. And the whole damn collection is (essentially) sold out? Ok, technically, the floral wool-blend miniskirt is still available, but who’s wearing wool when it’s 70 degrees outside after the most lingering winter on record? And here we were, so thrilled to have (finally) lost (some of) the baby weight, when the only size left in the leather-trimmed jacquard jacket is an IT48? Fine! Back to carbs and a regular breakfast we’ll go. Except the only size left in the matching skirt is an IT36?! Mixed messages, love. We’re certain you’re not reading this, because you’re probably gazing out on the Civita di Bagnoregio while you put the finishing touches on the 18th must-have bag you’ve designed today, blissfully oblivious to the cascade of bouquets arriving simultaneously from Marco Bizzarri and Alison Loehnis. But if you are: track down a pair of the New Ace floral-print sneakers in a 40.5, and we’re good again.

Until Milan, gorgeous! Your Daily