Yaaaaas! The Cindy Crawford renaissance continues with a new commercial for UK fast fashion brand Reserved. It’s just over two minutes long and it is freaking fabulous! No, seriously, it is the best thing you will see on the internet today. Promise.
It starts off with Crawford, in a hot pink pant suit, dancing down the street of a perfectly manicured suburban cul de sac. Her moves are weird, wonderful, and utterly shameless. Her neighbors, including Hottie McHotterton (aka Dacre Montgomery from Stranger Things season 2), look on from their lawns and driveways in stunned amazement.
We all do, really. Because while Taylor Swift’s “awkward” dance moves in the Delicate video were just that — awkward — Crawford’s equally “awkward” moves are a wonder to behold. Not that it’s a contest or anything. Because it’s not. I’m just saying.
OK. So after the street dancing, the video cuts to an interior shot of a family sitting on the couch and flipping through the channels. Naturally, Crawford is on every channel.
The family settles on a channel showing a movie that seems to have reached it’s dramatic climax. Eric Roberts (father of Emma and brother of Julia) thinks he’s got the upper hand on Daeker Montgomery, but just then, the elevator doors open and in walks Crawford in a white pinstrip suit and dramatic wide-brimmed hat. She struts over to Montgomery, whips off her oversized black sunglasses, and says “I believe that’s… a Royal Flush.”
What does it mean? Who knows? Who cares! It’s thrilling in its campiness. The office is like something out of an ’80s TV show set in Beverly Hills. And Cindy is just flawless. Montgomery can’t take his eyes off her. Who could?
Then the director calls “cut” and Cindy peaces out, exiting the stage and getting into a car with a giant bug in sunglasses and a flannel shirt. Again, it’s like something out of an ’80s TV show — Alf or The Muppet Show. It’s not a specific reference, but it works. It sooooo works.
Cut to Crawford in a black suit and matching cowboy hat, delivering more of her wonderfully odd dance moves on a studio set covered in white columns.
This time, the bug from before is dressed in black and sitting in the director’s chair. Because, sure.
“Fashion!” he says as she vogues for the camera. And then “I love you, Cindy.” Because of course he does. We all do.
Then the mood shifts. The song changes and we see Crawford in a color-blocked windbreaker in front of a brilliant sunset. The camera pulls back to reveal that this too is a set. Crawford is always on. Always working it. Maybe it’s a metaphor? Probably not.
Oh god! It’s just so good! It doesn’t mean anything — nothing really happens — but there is no denying or escaping Crawford’s star power. How much did Reserved pay for this video? Whatever they paid, it was worth every cent and then some. Fabulous. Just fabulous!
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